Being a restaurant manager it’s common to have sight of a server scurrying towards you with a ticket in hand, look of defeat in their eyes, and beads of sweat forming on their brow…
So you’re always prepared to talk to even the most cantankerous guests with a demeanor of calm professionalism, that can soothe a beast.
Sometimes however, no matter how much you angle your eyebrows to show concern, lean towards them to show care, or soften your voice to show understanding, they will not only still be angry, but it might even get worse.
Like, way worse.
It wasn’t until recently that I understood one reason why this is so.
A few days ago I learned, that it is completely possible to be disgusted by politeness.
I live in a safe, not-too-shabby apartment, located in a great part of town.
Still, a drug dealer lives above me, and a couple doors down the hall.
His “clients” are… well, wealthy.
They “shop” with him all hours of the day and night, never remember his gate request code so you have to get out of your car and open the gate because they’re in the way, and he ALWAYS meets them in their cars so he walks back and forth trying to figure out where his client is parked.
None of this bothers me, though.
See, my feathers are only slightly ruffled when I come home to a Porsche, Rover, Benz, etc. casually idling in my parking spot (It reminds me I need an upgrade).
Oh, but what REALLY grinds my gears, is how nice they are when I request they move or notify them of my presence.
I want to dislike them for doing bad things in my parking space with their fancy cars, but every encounter ends with a sentimental afterthought of how they honestly didn’t mean any harm.
“They just want to buy their drugs and go on about their schedule.”
Last week the dealer told me he liked my hair. He was super sweet.
Yesterday a “client” was so sorry about being in my way, he gave me an unopened bag of candy leftover from his lunch. He was also a sweetheart.
How dare they lessen my reason to be angry, and display such a nice example of kindness.
… they make me sick.